Summer Recap

Uggh...just accidentally hit delete. Boo. This will definitely aid in trimming up my thoughts a bit and cut down on rambling. I took the summer off from writing and after reading the last entry I think I have a better idea of why. I was being really hard on myself and I don't think writing was helping. I turned to drawing for therapy. I was trying to work out "our story" in my head and beating myself up that I couldn't find the words. I would love to write a children's book aimed at families with free-spirited kids like our Bubu. At Ozzy's urging I am taking a page from Sofie and letting the pictures come first and the words later. I have some of the visuals of a book and the phrasing is beginning to come. I am inspired to work on this project because I don't want to explain Sofie to anyone. I don't want her to be tolerated. I want her to be celebrated. I want to expect things from her. I don't want to settle on the easy path because the thought of that path makes me sad. I think it is because settling suggests that we are selling Sofie short. I, so often, am worried about my art leading to something ( a few dollars, some vain praise). But this book project has brought me to something more- I am doing it for me. If anyone else is moved by it-great. But that isn't what drives me. Thank you Sofie for that lesson. I choose to twirl. These days we are feeling very hopeful for the future and THAT is scary as hell. Sofie had her six month evaluation in May and her therapy team, Ozzy and I agreed that she was ready to be in a school setting with typically developing kids. With the recommendations from her team and suggestions on what to look for, we started looking for a half-day preschool for Sofie. God bless the internet. We found White Plains Children's Center in Cary. It is AMAZING! During the tour Sofie wanted to stay. That really gave us the push we needed to realize that she was ready. So she started in mid-June going three days a week. She loves it and we are so thrilled that therapy in the months prior gave her the tools she needed to excel there. The teachers are sweet and very knowledgeable. Sofie seems to talk more at school. That has been a real education for us-the words are in there. Can't say enough good things about school. I just love that they see Sofie for Sofie and not as any academic diagnosis. The kids seem to really like Sofie and she seems, at least, intrigued by them. She is improving following directions and most importantly loves going to school. It makes me so hopeful for pre-school and kindergarten. She is proving every school day that she can learn from her peers. One little girl in her class loves dolls and Sofie held a doll at school and patted it on the back and rocked it saying "mah-beh-bee. mah-beh-bee" Feeling so hopeful and that makes me scared. Am I being naive to daydream of Sofie in a mainstream kindergarten classroom? Time will tell. We begin the meetings with Wake County schools in about a month. A fun scary time. So much more to say but I will stop for now.